Procrastination is a Strategy for Self-Protection
Procrastination is
not just a bad habit, but a way of expressing internal conflict and projecting
a vulnerable sense of self-esteem. Few
people can give up procrastinating until they understand the function that
procrastination can begin to weaken them.
Five Fears
- Fear of Failure
- Fear of Success
- Fear of Control
- Fear of Separation
- Fear of Attachment
Inner Message
Fear of Failure
(Fear of Judgment/PERFECTIONISM)
- Mediocrity breeds contempt. (But a last-minute effort can be
ordinary because if I really put my ALL into it, it must be PERFECT.)
- Difficult things should be EASY.
- Do it alone. (Asking for help is weak.)
- There is only one RIGHT WAY!
- I hate to lose/fail so I don’t enter
the race.
- All or nothing
- I’m stuck with my choice…”Made my bed
and must lie in it.”
Fear of Success
- I’ll become a workaholic. (Have to live up to others’
expectations.)
- I don’t deserve success.
- If I succeed. I’ll hurt someone.
- I could get hurt myself. (Be in
spotlight: have power.)
- If I’m too perfect, I’ll be left
alone.
- If I’m successful, what will I lose?
Fear of Control
(Power struggle with authority to assert your influence)
- The world is unpredictable. (Control “them” before “they” can
control me. Disempower “them.”)
- If someone is strong, then I must be
weak.
- Cooperation is capitulation and
diminishes my power.
- To thwart “them” is more important
than getting what I want.
Fear of Separation
- I can’t stand on my own two feet. (Can’t make decisions without another’s
help.)
- I like being #2.
- Take care of me.
- Rescue me.
- Keep old relationships alive.
(Unfinished business.)
Fear of Attachment
- Give ‘em an inch, they’ll take a mile.
- What’s mine is yours, so what’s left
for me?
- Commitment hurts.
- I’ll turn into a werewolf.
THE
PROCRASTINATOR’S CODE…
I must be perfect.
Everything I do should
go easily and without effort.
It’s safer to do
nothing than to take a risk and fail.
I should have no
limitations.
If it’s not done
right, it’s not worth doing at all.
I must avoid being
challenged.
If I succeed,
someone will get hurt.
If I do well this
time, I must always do well.
Following someone
else’s rules means I’m giving in and I’m not in control.
I can’t afford to
let go of anything or anyone.
If I expose my
real self, people won’t like me.
There is a right
answer, and I’ll wait until I find it.